Maayo Kaayo

Twenty ten was this great year of God giving me good things. And I may not have blogged in the last 8 months, but it's New Years and the day, the season, demand some accounting of my living and some contemplation.
January 1, 2010. I was stuck in Chicago, for the second time in a week, ridiculously frustrated, tired and just wanting to be home! Ironically three days later, having arrived home, I packed my car and moved. Transplanting to Calgary with hopes of things that might come to fruition. And one year later I can say that none of them turned out as I had hoped or expected.
Thus far you're probably wondering where all the good was. Well, I fell into it, or God tricked me into it, or something! While I was camping out in the home of kind friends, working towards something else, God began to plant me in their neighbourhood and church. And by March I realized that I wanted to call this place home, and these people my community. So I've stayed and been so blessed in it all.
Last year as I wandered, (was that really just last year??), I felt like I connected with Henri Nouwen's question of Where do I belong?, and that's what I was asking God. And He responded with Bowness and Awaken. He took away the wandering in my heart, the part of me always looking for the next thing, the restless part. He planted me here.
January 1, 2011. I slept in after a late night with friends. Woke to sunshine and drew up my blinds, made coffee, turned up Sufjan Stevens and spent a few hours carving back the chaos in my life. Making space to breathe and live. I don't pretend to guess at 2011. I hope for more good things; I look forward to growing season again, I hope midwifery school starts this fall, I hope to create more rhythm in my life in this neighbourhood, I hope to make certain steps in loving people better. But that's all I've really got. I'm so grateful for what God has given me, for a year that was that good! Here's to another!

Spoons scramble at Thursday night dinner.


Working on my Skip It skills with this dumpster find.


Made a cross country trip with my friend Meghan, Hello Wisconsin!


Said goodbye to my dear old friend Matilda, moved on to Frieda the Matrix, and lost her just before Christmas. The New Year will bring car shopping.


Turned 25 on Vancouver Island.

Thanksgivng with my amazing family!

And for the first time since I was half my age, I'm rocking some bangs.

The Summer Reading List

School is done, what a sigh of relief! No assigned reading, night classes or assignment deadlines for at least the next four months. I intend to spend the summer, which is currently being held at bay by May flurries, with work, gardening, reading and trips to the mountains. Ahhh!
As such I have composed for myself a summer reading list. I realized a while back, the complete lack of fictional reading in my diet. My non-school books still tend to focus on theology, spiritual formation and discipline and world issues. None of that creative stuff. So I am making an attempt at even list for the summer, 4 parts fiction and 4 parts not. The list:

1. Passage to Juneau - Jonathan Raban - This travel book, is actually falling into my fiction category. It follows the authors' sail from Seattle to Juneau via the Inside Passage. And all the while telling stories of the explorers, natives and contemporaries who have lived their lives on it.
2. Surprised by Hope - NT Wright - It's NT. And he's addressing our theology of death, resurrection and what the Christian hope truly is and isn't. I'm excited.
   
3. Hey Nostradamus! - Douglas Coupland - This will be my first Coupland read. From a school shooting in Vancouver a story is told through two students, twisting into their religion and life a dozen years later, all told supposedly with dry humor.
4. Freedom of Simplicity (Foster) / The Wounded Healer (Nouwen) - I am giving the two of these only one spot. Because I've actually already read half of each. And they're incredible, and they just need to be read to completion.
5. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen - I picked up a copy at a used book sale this weekend, and can't wait to give it a try!
6. Colossians Remixed - Walsh & Keesmaat - One half biblical commentary on the book, and one half what do we do with it. The subtitle has me hooked: subverting the empire.
   
7. Book of Negroes - Lawrence Hill - Follows one child forced from Africa into slavery, and her life long journey out of slavery and eventually back home. I will read it with a box Kleenex.
8. The Original Jesus - NT Wright - NT again. I found this at the used book sale on the weekend, and it must be read. As you can probably imagine, it looks at the historical Jesus.

There it is. Written in stone. The must reads. I'm excited to soak up all the ideas and stories and for all the new things to think about. And if this snow ever melts I'm looking forward to days spent sitting outdoors with one of the above.

Sunday Morning

I had tea with a friend this morning, so I made dark chocolate raspberry scones. Delish!

Embracing Bright Sadness

It's spring here all windy and sunny, and people out walking and buying bicycles across the street. I have been enjoying walks down to the river and around the neighbourhood, past incredible houses and yards that look like acreages, and rundown apartment complexes and boarded up homes. I love this strange place of Bowness.
I have been working with the twins for the last 3 weeks and this is really the perfect job for me right now! I spend my days juggling the babes, so far they're still so small that I can lift and care for one in each arm. Right now the most challenging part is feeding or burping them both at the same time. But the the true challenge will come as they get bigger. Yikes. All in all I think it's perfect: 2 sweet babies by day, social life and good night's sleep by night!
There are about 3 weeks left of school and my only remaining assignment is a hermeneutics paper on Hebrews 6, and whether or not Christians can reject Jesus and then be brought back to repentance. I anticipate it to be intense, but really good too, right?
Also good - Lent, I've been really challenged so far, and I'm glad about that. I've participated in Lent before and found my practice a little empty. This has hit closer to my heart, my choices, my pocketbook. Perfect. It hits when my favourite pair of jeans get a bad hole in them, I only have 2 other pairs. To shop now would simply be filling a need, but instead I get to exercise restraint and wait until after Easter. Wearing the jeans I like less, wearing skirts and leggings. Keeping my fast and recognizing that so many do not get to choose to simply buy new jeans when old ones get holes. Much less clothes they don't need, or luxurious treats like chocolate and lattes. This is my Bright Sadness this year.

Tulips on the Table

I have tulips on the desk in front of me, and tulips are things that make me happy. So I smile.
Coming to the end of reading week I have accomplished a deplorably small amount of reading. Oops. Added to that issue is the part where my computer crapped out this last week, with no warning. Taking it with it all my class notes, which would assist my midterm prep. I'm hoping resurrection is in it's future.
Lent started on Wednesday and I decided to participate. I'm going to try to keep up with someone's version of the Lenten lectionary. But more for certain, I have put some restrictions on my buying habits. I tend to spend my "extra" money on such things as lattes, chocolate and clothes. All "me" things, and all offer me some sense of temporary satisfaction. I am not buying any of them for the next 40 days, and maybe, hopefully far less of them after.
Reason 1: is that they are ultimately selfish things, they don't benefit others, they are me hoarding good things all for myself. Reason 2: is that I believe that the excess of my budget is indeed the blessing and provision of God, for the express purpose of blessing others. And me using it so indiscriminately is actually me stealing it from those God had intended to bless through me. Whether those others are my roommates or the poor, or someone else entirely.
So I am disciplining myself. And very glad to be. It's already hurt on several occasions, and that is proof enough to me that I hit the nail on the head, and chose well this season.
One week until the twins.

The Hitchhiker Who Stayed

I went to a show tonight and a girl I'd just met said to me, "your hair looks so... natural." Umm, thanks?? Now I thought I'd been having a pretty good hair day. I was feeling really great about my hair. Until I was suddenly feeling very self-concious and wishing I had crazy, unclean hipster hair. Thanks lady.
I've been working lots this last week, a different job every day, different house, different kids, different parents, different hours. It's a good way to keep from getting bored, and I've looked after some pretty sweet kids. But I'm also excited, because on Monday night I'll be interviewing for a contract nannying newborn twins! Which would offer more doses of normal and stable to my days. If I can deal with that. I think the demands of two infants would keep me on my toes enough. Until then, I'll keep touring the city finding all sorts of incredible and hidden neighbourhoods and beautiful homes!
Things seem rather impossible on the moving front, like things are just floating and maybe floating apart. I so want this to happen, I am excited and wish I wasn't being delayed. But I'm working on the whole trusting thing, and I love my current home and I really am happy.
I love this city, I love life. Now everything isn't simply glossy good, yet God has transformed my existence with joy. Not some ridiculous amount of smiling and happiness. But deep, peaceful and thankful joy. The wandering I did this fall was imperfect and so good, so necessary - I have been changed. Somewhere along the road joy hopped in my stationwagon, and I'm not letting it go!

3,2,8 and Joy

3 weeks in Calgary. I love this city, and life is good.
I have 2 classes a week, Pentateuch and Hermeneutics. And it's good to wake my brain up a bit, shake off my thinking skills, find out if they're still there. I've gotta say I'm a little afraid for my 2 academic papers.
I managed to snag the job I was hoping for, and am finishing up paperwork and then orientation and I should begin sometime next week. The job: working as a nanny, taking either on call - one off jobs or short term contracts. Working with kids, lots of change, and hopefully not getting bored! I am so grateful, this is the only job I applied for and it's one I think I'll really like.
I want to say something about Haiti. But haven't we all heard so much, the papers, radio, tv, emails, everywhere. It's so heavy and makes me think about the tsunami, and being there and so far away, and feeling helpless. Usually I feel the farthest thing from the apostle Paul, when he spoke of how he wanted to go and be with Christ. I confess; I want this life, and I want Heaven and God too, but I want to go when I'm old. Right or wrong, that's where I am. But with Haiti, when I consider the depth of this kind of suffering, it's the only time I can really desire and ask God to come soon if that would be better. To stop the groaning of creation, of His people. Because I can't comprehend.
The stories these last few days, of people being rescued, more than a week later. They have been such a source of joy for me, of relief. People I know are finally going to have their adopted son. These are small glimmers of beauty and the faithfulness of God. I may not know how to deal with all the other questions about all the other people. But I will trust, pray and rejoice in what is good.
This week a very small "something good" in my life, has been the 8 tiny little sprouts of Basil plants that have made their appearance in a small pot in my house! They bring me joy everytime I see them. To increase my joy I planted Rosemary, Thyme and Oregano just yesterday and am looking forward to their appearance in a few weeks!
What is bringing you joy lately?

Dear Anybody

I was trying to explain to Shye what this blogging thing was all about and she thought that the greeting above was best way to start. And so dear Anybody, I am moving. And how am I ever going to survive living in Calgary without this little girl and all her hugs, and a certain young boy and his attempts to dominate in wrestling.
I haven't moved in a very long time, moving is so much bigger than traveling or wandering. Living nowhere in particular doesn't scare me. Living by some loose and open-ended version of a plan suits me just fine. Not knowing, always new. Great. Staying put? I hardly know how. This week, moving to Calgary seems like the continuation of my wandering adventure, but at some point new is going to become old, normal, and ordinary. And I'm afraid that I don't know how to do that.
At this point ordinary seems a long way off, while I am moving tomorrow, I know that one month from now I should be 'moving' my things across the city again into some sort of apartment that may be home for some time. For now I will be living with a handful of new people, and then I will be living with more new people. I am going to have to learn what it looks like to love my neighbour and teammates in a place I don't even know about yet. I am starting school on Tuesday, and it has been 3.5 years since I was in school, what have I got myself into? And while for the next few weeks I am a bit of my own boss, I am also looking for a new job. There's plenty of uncertainty and newness on the horizon.
For now I am excited and ready for the challenge, but certainly sad to leave. The weight of leaving is heavy. I am not just traveling, I am moving. I am making the choice to be somewhere else, a choice to leave my family. I feel as though the decision was made too easily, and I feel as though it was birthed in me so slowly and with prayer. Both.
I am moving tomorrow.
From,
Kim

Christmas 09

Hope you've all had a Merry Christmas! We enjoyed a pretty great day together.

And so this is Christmas...

I am home, for a small stint, a window as wide as many of my other stays this fall. But it's home, and that always feels more stable. I have been here a week and will stay put for one more. Enough time to enjoy Christmas Day with everyone, before I hurry off on Boxing Day to my next location!
After 3 years of considering attending Urbana, and having finally ruled it out, I am now actually going. My connection with MoveIn had them urging me to attend with them, to assist with their exhibit, to see what God has for me and if perhaps He would use my presence there. I had been feeling pretty funny about the idea of going, my discomfort with the Christian-mega conference and celebrity-ism, added to my experience of having received direction from God this fall, had helped me to rule it out. I am not going overseas now or in the next few years, I am not looking to make a connection with a missions agency, I am not wondering how God may use me and my skills for His kingdom. At least for now I have direction. I feel some amount of wonder at how God has knit together good things for my life, and I am excited about these new things!
But after all that, I am going, I made the very last minute decision, and have been surprised to see my going almost completely covered by other's generosity. Without me ever asking. Maybe God does indeed have reasons for me to be there. So on Boxing Day, I'll fly to St. Louis and spend the week with 20,000 others in worshiping God and considering His mission.
And promptly after my return I will pack my things into some sort of vehicle and head south to Calgary, where I am moving in with a friend in her busy community of many. I have a place to stay for the month of January, with the hopes that a team will be ready to MoveIn as early as February!
And that isn't an entirely crazy hope either. Already there are 3 or 4 of us interested in moving in by that date. And I really believe that more people are coming, perhaps even because of Urbana, that we will have 3-8 people, maybe even 2 teams, ready to MoveIn. Part of my work in January is going to be doing the neighbourhood research for these future teams. We are looking to identify "patches" of socio-economic need, high density living and large percentages of unreached peoples.
Other than that, I have enrolled at ABC in two courses, I am working slowly towards finishing my degree with them, and mostly I just like the studying. I continue to wait for news about a midwifery program at Mount Royal, the media is publishing multiple articles about the great need and the lack of midwives - come on, let's at least get started at changing things! And I am looking for permanent full time work, which is kind of fun. Just what do I want to do? Time to try something new?
I hope you all have a Merry Christmas, in whatever corner of the globe that you find yourself in! I am looking forward to another holiday with my dear family. My father managed to win a gift basket of wine etc, from his work party that should make the holidays a little merrier, if you know what I mean... And I have been appreciating as always, this season of Advent. I feel in this season, of the calendar and of my life, that I hear the voice of one shouting in the desert, "prepare the way for the LORD."

How Many Kings?

Follow the star to a place unexpected
Would you believe after all we’ve projected
A child in a manger
Lowly and small, the weakest of all
Unlikeliest hero, wrapped in his mothers shawl
Just a child
Is this who we’ve waited for?

Cause how many kings, stepped down from their thrones?
How many lords have abandoned their homes?
How many greats have become the least for me?
How many Gods have poured out their hearts
To romance a world that has torn all apart?
How many fathers gave up their sons for me?

Bringing our gifts for the newborn savior
All that we have whether costly or meek
Because we believe
Gold for his honor and frankincense for his pleasure
And myrrh for the cross he’ll suffer
Do you believe, is this who we’ve waited for?
It’s who we’ve waited for

How many kings, stepped down from their thrones?
How many lords have abandoned their homes?
How many greats have become the least for me?
How many Gods have poured out their hearts
To romance a world that has torn all apart?
How many fathers gave up their sons for me?

Only one did that for me

- Downhere

The Word Became Flesh

"The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood. We saw the glory with our own eyes, the one-of-a-kind glory, like Father, like Son, generous inside and out, true from start to finish." - John 1:14 (MSG)

Here's an article about how God is leading many people in Toronto, in this thing I'm checking out called MoveIn. He seems to be getting ready to birth the first teams into needy and unreached patches in Calgary, where I hope to be apart of the initial research and teams moving in, starting this New Year! Click here to read the full article.

"It isn't some program or a project," says Paul, MoveIn's founder, "It's not some experience, then you back to your normal lives. MoveIn is our new lives."
"MoveIn is about prayer and obedience to the voice of God. It's about more than just meeting your neighbours; it's about reaching those who are getting missed."

"It's a kingdom experiment, there's no template," says Dean, a career man and a leader in the Flemingdon Park multi-team network. MoveIn is contextualized to
particular buildings and there are no rules to follow. There's freedom to fail and no point to playing it safe. He says it's exciting to see, "nominal Christians wake up from their slumber, open their eyes and say, 'so this is what Christianity is supposed to be about'."

T-Dot

I've been in Calgary since last Friday, mostly just hanging out with Steph, and mostly waiting for a meeting I had yesterday morning. I met with a couple guys from MoveIn, which is a movement/organization/idea all about mobilizing teams of Christians to move into poor and unreached neighbourhoods in our cities. Which is what I'm interested in doing. Incarnational living in the context of community.

The meeting was great, I'm excited about what they're doing, and I'm excited that we could get something started here in Calgary. As a result of the meeting it seems that I am going to head east to Toronto for 2 weeks to see just how this is working out there, to meet folks who have MovedIn, and to help with some current admin-type projects. Breakfast meeting yesterday, and bham - I'm going to Toronto! I'm crazily excited, this is a great opportunity being handed to me, to learn and for fun and to make sure that this is what I want to get into!

Next Steps: Part 1-2-3

Much to my delight I now find myself at home. Every time I travel I reach a point when I want to return to the people I love, which then requires me to also return to this city they live in! So, here I am back in GP.
I am so glad I detoured and found myself "waiting" in Nelson, the two weeks I spent there were necessary for me to finish thinking, praying, processing. And when it finally came time to leave it was because I wanted to be home, and not simply because I had nowhere else to be.
It is easier to return home to GP, and to be excited about it, when you know that your stay will be a short one. To prove that, I will be leaving again this Friday, heading down to Calgary for a handful of reasons and a handful of days, and then back up north. When I return I will try to find some work to keep me busy until Christmas, (if you know of anything...).
So the question now is obviously: What next? And amazingly I think I know and I'm excited about it too! I am planning on moving to Calgary in the New Year to find full-time work, and part-time studies. I am hoping to finish my ABC degree in the next couple years as I have a half dozen or less, classes left. That is part one.
Part two, I am pursuing an intentional community living situation. I have been reading, praying and having many conversations about community living for the last 2 years. And in particular, thinking about forming a community where hospitality and knowing those who are poor is part of the point. Very excitingly I have some leads towards building or finding this kind of community in Calgary.
Part three, this is the part that is a true miracle: Midwifery re-enters my life! Alberta's first approved, university level, midwifery education program is supposed to begin this coming fall, in Calgary! And if all the necessary pieces for that to happen go ahead and happen, then I will be the first to apply for the program! That means starting from scratch, it means four more years, but I have figured out how much I want this and I am willing to start again.
With all these things on the horizon home is a great place to be, I'm here to enjoy my family, friends and the next two months. I am continuing to try to live with the quote "Be Here Now" in mind, I'm trying to learn about waiting and living out my questions, and daily choosing joy.

Waiting...

Update: We left the ranch, left WWOOFing, left California and Nevada. Ran to the open arms of Dani and Johnny in Boise. Kurtis went home. I hung out just long enough to make some plans and then change them. And left heading NW to Spokane, and on to Nelson, BC. That was the last 2.5 weeks and here I am.

I thought I would simply pass through Nelson too, but after a couple days of being here and enjoying the incredible beauty and the welcome of friends I decided to stay put for a (very) little while. In order to regroup, figure out how to deal with wanting to be a midwife and the reality of making that happen, and use the "left-over" time between leaving California and the New Year. You see I have an idea of what my plans are for the New Year. But really don't know what to do with myself until then. So I sat down, wrote out a resume for the first time in years and went around looking for work. It turns out that nobody's really hiring in Nelson, so that so far hasn't been too productive.

So I'm making some alternate plans. Ones that make me happy. And in the meantime I am trying to enjoy the lack of responsibility, the wide open days, this very beautiful place with low clouds, fall leaves, the very great Lakeside Park, and an outdoor prayer labyrinth. The warm welcome of a friend, the many places to get a warm cup of something. I'm calling this a vacation, aimless wandering, and waiting.

I have been reading more Henri Nouwen, who says this on waiting:

"Active waiting implies being fully present to the moment with the conviction that something is happening where we are and that we want to be present to it. A waiting person is someone who is present to the moment, believing that this moment is the moment."

So I am waiting and enjoying, and trying to remember to enjoy and to wait. And I will move on when this time is up.

Rainer Maria Rilke

On Solitude:
"Therefore, dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you. For those who are near you are far away, you write, and this shows that the space around you is beginning to grow vast. And if what is near you is far away, then your vastness is already among the stars and is very great; be happy about your growth, in which of course you can't take anyone with you, and be gentle with those who stay behind; be confident and calm in front of them and don't torment them with your doubts and don't frighten them with your faith or joy, which they wouldn't be able to comprehend. Seek out some simple and true feeling of what you have in common with them, which doesn't necessarily have to alter when you yourself change again and again; when you see them, love life in a form that is not your own and be indulgent toward those who are growing old, who are afraid of the aloneness that you trust."

On Christ:
"Why don't you think of him (Christ) as the one who is coming, who has been approaching from all eternity, the one who will someday arrive, the ultimate fruit of a tree whose leaves we are? What keeps you from projecting his birth into the ages that are coming into existence, and living your life as a painful and lovely day in the history of a great pregnancy? Don't you see how everything that happens is again and again a beginning, and couldn't it be His beginning, since, in itself, starting is always so beautiful? If he is the most perfect one, must not what is less prefect precede him, so that he can choose himself out of fullness and superabundance? - Must not he be the last one, so that he can include everything in himself, and what meaning would we have if he whom we are longing for has already existed?"
- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Rilke is moving me and losing me in the vast solitude he praises, it's petrifying and beautiful. And I wonder, could we each be simply living a day of the great pregnancy which will reach it's fullness in Christ's birth? What do you think?

My Mind and My Travels

I hardly know where to begin this post. I've actually been putting it off, because it feels like reporting a list of events, and not actually thinking anything. And who wants to read a list?

Let's try and get the list out of the way quickly: we went to San Fran, I wandered around Market and Mission and we went to a Giants game. That's 2 pro baseball games on this trip. I don't even follow baseball.

Then we moved north seeking the Pacific Ocean, and found it. And it was very, very cold. We tried to stay in a hostel, but it was full and found ourselves camping for $10 night, not bad. We also picked up a "friend" who was very interesting! He wore pirate shorts, and nothing else, we talked about how he would sum up the world with the word "Huh?" and about pot. He slept on our picknick table at the campsite. It was Friday night, and since we were already where we needed to be, we tried to head up to the vineyard we were supposed to start working. But they wouldn't let us come until Monday. So we spent 3 nights camping and hanging out, bathing in the lake. The nights got mighty cold for camping.

When we finally got to the vineyard, we were greeted with "Hey you're here, put up this clothesline." Basically the folks we were working for were miserable people who couldn't afford regular work crews and were using WWOOFers to do harvest for them. The other workers were most interested in smoking up and drinking, but they were just fine, we enjoyed them. We only stayed for 3 days and then ran away in the middle of the night to escape the bosses and "slavery", and laughing to ourselves that they had actually made us afraid! We went back across the state to the Catholic Worker, where people are glad you are there, feed you well and treat you with basic dignity.

We contacted the ranch we had plans with next, and asked if we could show up early, and they gave us the go ahead. We arrived Saturday night, to horses, milk cows, and wide open spaces in the Nevada desert.

In the midst of all this it's tough to figure out how I see God at work, what I am learning, what the point in any of it might be. I've been having lessons in learning to simply be, sitting beside a lake with nowhere else to be, may be enviable, but it can also make one feel wasteful. Is being quiet and unproductive wasteful?

I've been rereading The New Friars and asking this time what I can apply to the life I am already living. I don't want to be immobilized by it's radical call, I want to be changed. And I'm asking God to make next steps a little clearer, I have the ideas I've been thinking about, but I want to be sure He is leading, not me. And then there is learning how to communicate well with others, how to put others first. Trying to remember that God wants to work the fruit of the Spirit into my life, and that I must seek first the Kingdom.

My brain and heart are in as much a whirlwind as the traveling and working we've been doing.

Next Things

We're moving on today, after a month here at the Catholic Worker we're making tracks. Heading to San Fran today, see a Giants game tomorrow, maybe visit a new friend who happens to be a priest. Go to the ocean, and then on to a winery north of San Fran to pick grapes for about 10 days before we head back this way and on to Reno to check out a cattle and horse ranch! After all the uncertainty of where we were going to head next, a way has been made. New farms, new places, new things! And by the way, it's still really warm.

At the Catholic Worker

Life these last 2 weeks has been seemingly normal. All the while containing none of my usual activities, none of the usual people. Unusual food. Unusual work and chores. Unusual trips to Big Trees park and Yosemite.
I've been working at a Catholic Worker farm in Sheep Ranch California. We're 45min from any sort of town, but only 3 hours from a long list of great places to see in California.
My mornings start with a 9am meeting over "coppuccinnos" where we discuss the days work, the differences between mennonites, catholics, quakers and whatever category I fit into. We dig or back fill for various projects around the farm. Harvest veggies. Turn compost. Built a raised garden bed. Chuck rocks. Work on my tan. Sit and watch the chickens run free for 2hours a day. And then stop for lunch and dinner, using the garden's proceeds to try and come up with yet another creative connoction.
Our home doesn't lock, doesn't have much electricity at night, and won't promise you hot water. We have baby chicks, complete with the smell of baby chicks, in a corner of the house. And big black ants attack the toilet each night, swarming it. Only to be gone again come morning. We spend each night trying to find things to do to fill the night, trying to not go to bed at 9:30pm. I've finished the The Kite Runner and Spiritual Direction. My skin is often black, my nails too. I'm building calluses on my hands. I'm dealing with the critters and the snake in the garden.
But nothing feels out of the ordinary. This is just where I am. What I'm doing. Who I'm with. At least for the next 2 weeks.

Next

Since Portland we've been seeing a lot of the road, a lot of the sea and lot of fog. We never managed to find the somewhat secret Hobbit Trail, but settled on a beach with a lighthouse instead. We wimped out, and spent the wet and cold night in a cheap motel, did laundry, charged electronic devices. Functional and wise choices. The next day we drove for 45min before we realized we'd already passed our plans for the day, we turned around and drove 1hr back, and realized we didn't have exact change for the park pass. So we drove again back to town to get change, and drove back to Oregon Dunes park. We ended up back in the same town we'd spent the night for a late lunch in a fabulous cafe that seriously raised the stocks of that little town, and drove south through Denmark, and into California. And then we did the unthinkable, spent 2 nights in one place! The Hostel in the Redwood National Park is delightful, and so are the trees. So we spent 2 nights, in the fog, across from a ferocious beach. This morning we hit the road on time and spent the day driving south again, our destination: San Francisco. We stopped along the way at a roadside attraction known as the "Hill of Confusion" which "bends" gravity, and I'm still dizzy. Gotta run...