T-Dot

I've been in Calgary since last Friday, mostly just hanging out with Steph, and mostly waiting for a meeting I had yesterday morning. I met with a couple guys from MoveIn, which is a movement/organization/idea all about mobilizing teams of Christians to move into poor and unreached neighbourhoods in our cities. Which is what I'm interested in doing. Incarnational living in the context of community.

The meeting was great, I'm excited about what they're doing, and I'm excited that we could get something started here in Calgary. As a result of the meeting it seems that I am going to head east to Toronto for 2 weeks to see just how this is working out there, to meet folks who have MovedIn, and to help with some current admin-type projects. Breakfast meeting yesterday, and bham - I'm going to Toronto! I'm crazily excited, this is a great opportunity being handed to me, to learn and for fun and to make sure that this is what I want to get into!

Unemployed!

It's official - I'm unemployed! Everyone else is heading to work, being responsible, continuing on in "normal" and I get to plan my own days. What do I want to do today? It's kind of exciting.
I'm sure my days will mostly fill up, appointments and errands I have been putting off, can be put off no longer. I have to do a better job of packing things into storage, need to soak up this hot weather and there's a grand trip to plan!
It's less than 3 weeks until Chantal and I hit the road the West Coast. I can't wait for the beauty of the ocean, the 101, the mountains, the redwoods. I have to spend these weeks getting into shape, cause I have been lazy since boot camp ended. So I've started into a regular regime of running stairs to get ready to hike.
And then there's the farming to plan, my friend Kurtis has decided to join me, and we're searching out the best farms in California! This next chapter of life will be grand!

Camp?... ...Check!

Camp is over. Camp has been the final mark on my horizon for months and months. It has been the marker of the last big thing to be done in my term as youth pastor. I was scared of it, but I was straining for it to come. And as I knew He would God renewed my strength every morning, and I found the energy, love and creativity to make it through pleased with camp, pleased with the offering. I hope it was pleasing in His sight.
Over the next couple weeks I will tie up details here at work, and finish this chapter. Reaching unemployment, which goes along well with my current homelessness. It's strange to be in a position that for so many is one of brokenness, of helplessness and poverty. And to be here by choice and without suffering or fear. I am arriving where I intended to be, and I am supported on all sides by those I call family. I'm not truly homeless by any means. Just without an address.
One month to go, with some more work, some care of Dakota, more couch-surfing and then Chantal and I set off on our grand adventure, to be followed by my own WWOOF adventure.
I'm considering all sorts of questions and directions right now. And I'm trying to regain restedness. And I'm just about to realize the excitement of this.
And here are some pictures of the last 2 weeks of camp:

Sr. High camp at Jarvis Lake. I even tried wakeboarding!And Jr. High/Kidz Camp at Pineridge.

WWOOF

In the great expanse of unknown that will soon be my life and my unemployment, I have discovered one exciting option! After the trip down the West Coast (fingers crossed that this will for certain work out, it HAS to), I'm considering taking 3 months for more travel, fun and irresponsibility before I start looking for work and thinking about reschooling.
There is an organization out there called WWOOF (World-Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms), and basically members can volunteer with any of the thousands of host organic farms around the world. You work a few hours a day, get free room and board, meet the locals, see the sights and learn something new about farming, gardening, etc. These are farms are seriously ALL over the world, you can go anywhere, and your only costs are transportation and spending money! This sounds like a riot, I'm just in awe that such an opportunity is out there. And I think I'm going to go for it! Since I've already spent considerable time in Asia, it's time to head somewhere new, I'm ready for another corner of the world, and at the top of list: Argentina! Followed by Ecuador, any of the surrounding nations, and even just America.
So come September I may be saying Adios to GP once again, and hitting the road for something unlike any other adventure I've ever tried. I'm grinning just thinking about it.
PS: I'm looking for co-adventurers.

Cathartic Exercise

I was encouraged the other night by my friend Jen to consider using my blog as a cathartic exercise, even when I don't feel I have any great thoughts to write. I'll admit I had to look up the word cathartic before I could even use it above, and I discovered it is usually related to laxatives. Nice. Well, here I am...

It's not as though nothing has been happening in my life that would be worthy of blogging, it's just not a main release anymore. I think being on home soil, where I tell my stories and my thoughts with most people face-to-face, has made this spot less of a priority. But I'm going to attempt to regain some regularity (regularity and cathartic - great!) just blogging from my thoughts, my musings, my day-to-day.

I guess I should mention that since my last blog I have traveled to Calgary, Victoria and California. Not too shabby for a 4 week absence. I led a group of students down to Calgary to spend 4 days serving and learning at the Mustard Seed, which is an inner-city mission. Our time there was really exciting to be a part of, we were so welcomed and God was doing good things in the hearts of our students. So I was thrilled! Victoria was our annual Staff retreat, where we are so blessed and looked after in an incredible spot on the sea for four great days! That included time on a yacht, sea kayaking, lounging in the outdoor pool, non-stop food and I guess a bit of work in there too - vision casting and prayer. And finally I spent the last week in California - Disneyland! The whole family went, that's 8 of us for 8 days in 2 hotel rooms and we didn't kill each other! I don't think Disney and the crowds are quite my style, but it was an incredible experience and we had loads of fun. I love my family!

And now it's today. Less than 2 months remain in this job of mine, and I'm starting to get excited about what's next, what with all the possibilities! I have had plans, and then they've fallen through a zillion times now. And I'm frustrated, and sad and excited. I think the next step is going to require some big changes and for the first time ever that is a somewhat nerve-wracking prospect. But it's not as though I really want to stay here in Grande Prairie either. My inner feelings are complicated, they contradict.

Amidst that complication it is becoming more and more likely that the second half of my summer is going to be spent with small travels, friends and adventures. I am cooking up a hiking roadtrip down the West coast all the way to northern California. Stopping for some of the best day hikes along the way and seeing mountains, ocean, redwood forests! I am hoping to take sometime at a retreat or with a spiritual director trying to make sense of some of my directional confusion and the emotions wrapped up in it. I've just discovered that my friends Jen and Andrey might be in Alberta at some point and I'd love to see them! And there may be an opportunity to continue my involvement in fundraising and speaking out against sex trafficking in a summer tour. And all of those sound either very fun or at least deeply meaningful.

I finish work mid-July and then I'm free. Free to do these things. Free to figure out where I am in the midst of what I have pursued and what might be next. Free to be unemployed...gulp. But definitely free.

What a Good Day

A miracle was unfolded today. God gave me a gift.

I discovered just last week that all I need to complete my clinical requirements was one single experience, of any kind of skill. One that can be dated after January 27, 2008. So any experience I gain now counts.

And God provided! I had made a call, sent some emails, and I was waiting. Which I am very, very bad at doing. And just this morning my phone rang, one of my calls returned, the one I was hoping for. And an invitation was given to come and learn and finish my requirements! I am going to Boise, Idaho on Wednesday, for a week! I was crying and vibrating in my joy.

And then I went to work and received an email from my dear friend in Boise, with even more good news, and more excitement. In one day a wealth of God's blessings have been poured down on me. Jehovah Jireh. Giver of good gifts!

The Steal

I hit a Major sale at Tall Girl in Edmonton last weekend. And I managed to double my denim collection, which brings me up to 4 pairs! Uber-exciting. I bought two pair of jeans, originally priced at $130 each, and 5 shirts, for $130 Total!!
And as you can see, one of those pairs of jeans, happens to be overalls. Some really hilarious, wonderfully sassy overalls!

Happy Canada Day!

I spent last weekend with family down in Wetaskawin, celebrating my grandparents 50th anniversary. Congratulations to you both. They had a great party, and I enjoyed explaining my life to dozens of relatives I only see every 5-10years. We got to see a video of my grandparents whole lives, which was very enlightening, I was shocked to see my young-Grandma prancing around in some pretty small outifts! Not that I blame her, if I looked that good I would too! And Kayte and I dueted a Rosie Thomas song. Now I'm in a mad camp prep season. I'm out-of-town this next week with Sr. High / Young Adults Camp, back for 3 days and then on to a week of Teen Camp. Which I'm ultimately responsible for, and have to have pretty much done before I leave Saturday. Hence why I'm working on Canada Day. So I wish a Happy Canada Day to you all! And I'm moving on to my lists of To-Do's.


Don't they look fabulous?
Kayte and I sing.
My Mom escorts my Grandma in the wedding dress they both wore!
My Grandad reading a "bit of writing" to my Grandma!

PS: Even though it wasn't on my To-Do List I managed to end up in the Studio Y? float at the Canada Day parade this afternoon. I'm waved-out!

Ben & Lisa

My brother got hitched yesterday, and I think that's pretty great! He married my good friend Lisa, (and it was about time), I'm so glad I can now call her sister! It was an incredibly beautiful wedding, such a fun day. And I love digital photography and the instant results - Enjoy!


Kayte and I. May I just say that I loved my hair!

So I'm always tall, even here...

...But not as tall as my brother!

The End.

The Call

Amidst the mess of all my boxes, I just discovered my journal from the very first mission trip I was apart of, with YWAM LA, back when I was only 13 years old. My handwriting was terrible. But my notes and entries blew me away; God did mighty things in me in those two weeks. I found the following excerpt from the day after I heard God's call to ministry.

Father, at last night's lecture you gave me the chance to give you my heart, and life. Thank You. Do You know what? I'm very glad I took that chance. I no longer have to worry about my future, my will or my plans. I've heard Yours. I accept. I give You my heart, my soul, my past, my present and my future. Take them please. I am willing to give You my life, that it may be a blessing to others. You gave me a message last night, "Go ye into all the world and preach the good news," "To the ends of the earth." You have sent me and I will go, into all the world, preaching Your Good News! I find it so amazing that You would pick me to go into all the world. That you would fit me in to the Great Commission. That You have the time to look at me and say; here is where I want you and this is what you should be doing. Well Father it goes over my head. You want me! Please don't let me dissapoint You. May I make You proud. Thank You for choosing me! Amen.

Oh man, I wish I had that kind of clarity and certainty now! I was passionate, my thoughts were simple, I was naive. But I loved God, I had met Him, and I knew I would follow Him from that point on. I can remember that lecture. Not anything that was said, but where I sat and what that moment was like.
And I look back now, almost 10 years later, and wonder that God has indeed sent me into the ends of the earth, and called me into His work. That He has seen fit to use me. And I wonder, how much that decision and promise made to God, have shaped the course of my life. And if this is what He has done in the last 10 years, what will He lead me into in the next decade?
I marvel at my 13-year-old words and faith. And then I remember that I also saw fit to eat a bag of M&M Peanuts for breakfast each day of our trip. I was a bundle of maturity, and passion and childhood. Perhaps I still am. But He has seen fit use me!

Tomorrow's the Day

Tomorrow I go to Victoria. Mmmm. I'm happy.
Ever since I said goodbye to the ocean and island living in December, I've been looking forward to the spring Staff Retreat. In a few days there'll be pictures.

Odds and Ends

Here are the Odds and Ends:

• I'm feeling enormously better from the pneumonia, all is well. We discovered the likely cause: a large radius of mold caused by a slow leak in our basement, leaking directly into my room! Really nasty, but we've got it cleaned up and I've moved back down.
• The Edmonton road-trip worked out, I got to see my grand-folks, and go to the concert. The John Butler Trio are amazing - so freaking talented, I can't even explain. And The Skylight Room is a bit of a hole. And driving home all night and going to straight to work, is not the best plan!
• My midwifery degree seems to be falling apart at the seams, as the saying goes, "anything that can go wrong - will." I'm trying to figure out the pieces, and trust Jesus that He led me into this in the first place, and He won't leave me hanging. At least not forever.
• My Kuya TonTon just called me, all the way from the Phils, just to talk! I was so blessed! He and my Ate Nona, were my Manila-parents, they run the guesthouse I ended up living in for a bit. It was so special to hear from him, and seriously bizarre to get an unexpected call, late on a cold and snowy night!
• And then there's that... last week it was Spring, the snow was gone. This week it's Winter all over again, brushing off the car, letting it warm up, icy roads, 2ft of snow! Absolutely unacceptable!!
• I'm looking forward to 2 things: next week is our staff retreat... in Victoria!! Can't wait for a beautiful place, and some semblance of heat. And in a couple weeks I'm moving into a great basement suite with one other friend, and it will be great to reclaim certain freedoms!
  
• And now I have a prayer request, for a little 2-year-old girl who's facing a deadly cancer. Please pray for Charlize, as her last chance is receiving a stem cell transplant tomorrow. Her immune system is very very low, pray for a true miracle!!
  

Bad Blogger

I've become a bad blogger. Sorry. It's been a long time since I've graced this page with new words. Well in this moment I'm putting off heading to work, don't worry, I'll go in a minute. Life is good. Mr. John Reuben is here tomorrow night - should be a great show! We've been looking forward to this for quite a while - I hope a ton of kids come out! Guess I'm gonna have to put my hip-hop on.
And then even more than that, Friday morning we're all heading to Calgary for Emerge - ABC's youth conference. I haven't been to Cowtown in 2 years, and I'm excited. Of course this time I'm responsible for the well-being of almost 20 kiddos. Yikes! If you're out there, I'd appreciate your prayers for our safety and for the weekend to have a lasting effect.
Well, starting the car and heading in the direction of the Work can only be avoided for so long.

Meeting the White Hairs

Yesterday was a mildly stressful day as I was forced to realized my wonderfully plotted idea of bussing the kids to the Old Folks home was slightly flawed. Yes, at -30 something, busses don't really like to start. Faced with this fact in the early morning, I spent my day planning an alternative Service Project, just incase when we tried to fire the bus, (an hour before Youth began), if it wouldn't run, we would atleast not be scrambling!
And in a demonstration of my self-sufficiency, I went about all day madly planning the "in-case event", and didn't spend a moment in prayer about it! Seriously, what was I thinking? When it finally hit me, late afternoon, I sorted things out and asked God to intervene as He would will. And when they tried the bus a half hour later, she purred. Much to my delight!
So we went on to Wildrose Manor, piled off the bus and headed in to greet a snowy haired crowd. A smallish crowd I should say. And our kids picked up boxes and spread out, finding interested parties and setting up games of Scrabble, Monopoly and SkipBo. And the games went on for more than an hour, stories were told, and us young-uns generally got beat pretty good! At the end of the night we pulled out song sheets and enjoyed some hymns together, made our goodbyes and ducked out.
They loved us! And from all the reviews and anecdotes I've gathered - we loved them! I saw those kids come alive, even the crew who can usually be rowdy, or fearful of boredom, were attentive and kind. There wasn't a single issue of discipline, no warnings given. No better visit to an Old Folks home has ever happened in the history of Youth Groups! (Maybe that's a bit self-important!) It was awesome to watch! We were invited to come back anytime, and as far our teens are concerned - That'd be great!

Snowballs and Mafia

Another week, another Youth Group down, whew!
I had a blast tonight! We started off with a couple minutes of lovely awkward silence in the basement, that wasn't planned, but did really fit well in with our theme...
But then we really got going with one of the best snowball fights I've ever been in, a wonderful affair, of treason and cold, cold earfuls of snow. When that was sufficiently worn out, and our bodies sufficiently wet, we headed back inside. And enjoyed the most efficient game of Mafia ever played, anywhere - 4 mafia pinned in 4 rounds!
Which was good, because we had just enough time to get on to our theme: Noise. If you've ever heard of the Nooma videos, they're a really neat series of 10+min snippets; Rob Bell discussing one thing or another. And rather thought provoking too. So heading into a season of Bright Sadness next week (LENT), this was a good discussion to get our minds rolling, on the noise and distractions in our lives.
"Does the amount of noise in our lives have any connection to our inability to hear God?" And what things might we want to try removing, what distractions could we lay aside, even just for a short time?
So we had some really good discussions, I was really, Really impressed with all our kids! And really, Really moved by God showing up. This week I feel like, "Yes, we had a great night at Youth Group. God was there and we had ourselves a lot of fun!" I'm feeling jazzed tonight, just cause He showed up and worked out all the plans. Now I must sleep, after all morning comes early and next Friday will be here so fast.

Good Things

I have had two amazing moments this week! How am I so lucky? And should I really chance mislabeling it with the word "luck"?
What a place to be in, I feel that I am starting something with incredible blessing being placed on me. And it might turn out to be a very difficult thing, it might be very demanding, and I might even have to do battle sometimes. But it is starting so good, I'm being given the gift of starting well. Everything that anyone else can do to help me start, is being done, is being given. The rest is really up to me and my faithfulness to God and task set before me.
The first wonderful Moment happened during Tuesday morning staff meeting, not a place that many people look to for good gifts! But I was welcomed, with warm words, into a group I already know. And they surrounded me and they laid hands on me and prayed, setting me aside for this ministry.
And Moment two happened just tonight, after a chilly couple hours of sledding, with the Youth who have been placed in my care. As they too encircled me, and laid hands and prayed, and the faith-filled prayers of these 14-17 year-olds praised God for His plan. And we all asked Him to do great things in this time, and to make us willing to serve, and to use our gifts.
I am loved, and trusted. And I love them in return, I don't think a better group of teens exists anywhere, these are really great kids! And God has given them to me, and me to serve them. And that is a huge responsibility, I feel it, and I know it's heavy - but I am really just thrilled.
Who wouldn't be thrilled when they had just enjoyed a cupcake buffet with "Welcome Kim" spelled out over top?