Waiting...

Update: We left the ranch, left WWOOFing, left California and Nevada. Ran to the open arms of Dani and Johnny in Boise. Kurtis went home. I hung out just long enough to make some plans and then change them. And left heading NW to Spokane, and on to Nelson, BC. That was the last 2.5 weeks and here I am.

I thought I would simply pass through Nelson too, but after a couple days of being here and enjoying the incredible beauty and the welcome of friends I decided to stay put for a (very) little while. In order to regroup, figure out how to deal with wanting to be a midwife and the reality of making that happen, and use the "left-over" time between leaving California and the New Year. You see I have an idea of what my plans are for the New Year. But really don't know what to do with myself until then. So I sat down, wrote out a resume for the first time in years and went around looking for work. It turns out that nobody's really hiring in Nelson, so that so far hasn't been too productive.

So I'm making some alternate plans. Ones that make me happy. And in the meantime I am trying to enjoy the lack of responsibility, the wide open days, this very beautiful place with low clouds, fall leaves, the very great Lakeside Park, and an outdoor prayer labyrinth. The warm welcome of a friend, the many places to get a warm cup of something. I'm calling this a vacation, aimless wandering, and waiting.

I have been reading more Henri Nouwen, who says this on waiting:

"Active waiting implies being fully present to the moment with the conviction that something is happening where we are and that we want to be present to it. A waiting person is someone who is present to the moment, believing that this moment is the moment."

So I am waiting and enjoying, and trying to remember to enjoy and to wait. And I will move on when this time is up.