You Bless Me

Yes folks, here I am hugging the swan. Why would I be hugging the swan?
Well because you from the Swan City Church of Christ have become the most amazing blessing in my life. I don't think I have ever seen and known God the way that I've been seeing Him and His faithfulness this month! I don't know how to pray my thanks and I don't know how to thank all of you. "Thank you" seems like such small words to express what I feel and need to tell you. You have blessed me, you have blessed me, you have blessed me.
I've told you before that I felt God's call to midwifery more than anything before in my life. But with that being such an internal, intangible thing my assurance of it fluctuates. Not that I am any less interested in midwifery, not that I for a moment want out. But that I wonder - has God really CALLED me to this? Calling is such a big idea, one that I have previously shied away from. But last fall when Midwifery School hit me, and now after a month like this and a BBQ like yesterday's, I am so humbled. And I look at God with amazement at the ways He provides, that He would use me, and that He has moved you to be so generous. You encourage me, you give, you love me.

THANK YOU!

Do You SEE People?

"Do you see anything?"
It's the question Jesus asked the blindman after He spit in his eyes. And it's the question Jeff (of New Brunswick - you know, Jeff in New Brunswick, ??) asked himself and now poses for us.
And his answer is the very same as the once-was-blindman's - "I see people."
But what difference does that make to any of us, we see people everyday. But I wonder if we really do SEE people or if we skin colour, style, careers, lifestyles, age, whatever. Do we classify people as this or that, so we don't actually have to see them as individual created beings. Children of God that He has a plan for, a will for, someone made in His image.
What if we stop labelling people? What if we just choose to love them regardless of what we might think they are?
So today I'm recommending 2 articles first the above mentioned-gooder by Jeff on 24-7 Prayer and one that hits on AIDS and inconviencing ourselves because God wants us to love others, by Ryan Hannah on Relevant.

I guess for me this is really at the front of my mind right now. As I head into school I'm trying to think of the things I want to remember to be, to do when I am fully engaged in all the busyness of missions and studying and living with others. I want to learn from all my past travels, from what God has been teaching me these last years. Most of these ideas, these goals have to do with loving God and loving people. That's all life ever seems to be about.

So I guess I want to remember to SEE people. To know them, to listen to them, to know their names, to go above and beyond, to pray for them, to think of others first.

Learn to Comment 101

1. Now if there is anyone out there who is interested in commenting but aren't so sure about the process, here we go...

After the incredibly inspiring and witty blog that you want to comment on there will be a link saying how many comments have been left for that article. Click on that link, whether it says "0 comments" or "23 comments".

Click and a new little window will apear. You can read what other people have said (kinda like eavesdropping, hehe). And then you can write whatever you'd like to say.

You can comment whether you are a member or not. You can leave you name, your email or stay anonymous.

But now that you have read this it means you have to comment - no excuses now - uhuh.

PRAYER ALERT : SPIDERS

I was reading the blog of a family whose working at the clinic in Manila right now and got a wake-up a call about the critters whose home I'm moving into. No not the cockroaches, not the rats, nope, they don't really bother me. I can deal with them. Its the spiders, the little ones, the BIG ones, all of them!
I realized that I need to alert my prayer warriors. You might think I'm a baby. You might think this is hilarious. But I'm serious. I'm going to need a miracle, my sanity is dependant on Jesus here!
Please, please pray that God begins to work a miracle inside of me. I am uncontrollably afraid of spiders. Even my coworkers know this - they run and squish at my screams! But I can't even explain to you how serious I am. The thought of seeing one, living with them, not knowing where they are, or being touched by one. Seriously, seriously, seriously. Please pray for God's grace for me!

My Excellent Planning

You would never believe how much is involved in getting ready to leave the country for a couple years! Seriously!
I'm feeling pretty calm today but I'm sure the panic will hit again. And I can assure you - a week ago I thought I'd never manage to finish the phone calls. Immunizations, doctor, dentist, eye doctor, health insurance, car insurance, packing, buying textbooks and plane tickets, finishing a big project at work - not to mention the fact that there are people in my life! And apparently leaving the country for a couple years, isn't something car insurers are used to dealing with - they just don't know what to do with me!
I can't believe I wasn't thinking about all these things earlier, I'm usually a planner, but it never occured to me to be planning things a little earlier than May. I've only known about school for 6 months now! (Dripping with sarcasm, dripping.)
Of course I'm usually dripping with sarcasm. Something I only really discovered last year. In DTS I lived with 20 people, from so many cultures, so many languages, so many life experiences. I found out that my sarcasm wasn't always understood, wasn't always funny, wasn't always right. It was a good lesson. It hurt. And I'm not perfect now. Sometimes after I let a comment slip I wonder if maybe it wasn't what I meant to say, or maybe it was, but I shouldn't have wanted to say it in the first place. But I digress this isn't what I was really writing about, was it?
Life is complicated. For everyone. And you don't really realize how connected, and bolted down you are until you try to pick up and go. Then in one month try and fight for freedom. If you're ever in my situation, may I suggest - start to work out the details just a smidge earlier than I have!

Fleshing Out - Excitement

Everyday someone asks me if I am excited about leaving, training to be a midwife or entering missions.
"Excited?"
"Yeah, I can't believe its almost here / I can't believe they're actually going to let me do this / Only 23 more days / I can't believe I found something that involves so many of my passions / I've been waiting so long, it barely seems real / Just trying to get all of life in order before I leave / Yeah, and a little bit scared too."
Those are my usual responses. You've probably heard them. And they're true, that's why I say them. But I honestly don't feel like they really communicate much. They're pat. Not that I have a problem with pat - Pat's a great name.
I wish I could actually say what I'm thinking. Seems easy enough, but I don't exactly know how. So I'm making a list - these are some of the right words:

• emotional
• overwhelmed
• ecstatic
• anxious
• expectant
• curious
• impatient
• keen (an entirely Canadian word!)
• joyful
• nervous
• encouraged
• ready

Now you know. Please keep me in your prayers. Everything begins in 23 short days, actually by the time you read this it'll probably be less!

I'm really excited! (Ha)